the year of the boar

so, it's the chinese year of the boar (my sign--hey! no jokes).  and since it's our year, it's supposed to be a really good one.

"The year of the Boar: is one of benevolence, one with a lot of 'feel good factor', one of "abundance" and a good year for business.  Life in this year will be lived to the full and although there will be uncertainty it will be minimal.  It is a rich year with impetuous acts, but care is recommended with any matters concerning money.  The Boar is the symbol for great courage and integrity."

sounds good, eh?

i'm grateful for everything and everyone i have right now. but the bad news.....just keeps coming so frequently...i guess it's just difficult to keep up.  i go into denial and when i remember what i'm trying to ignore, i get so damn sappy.

i don't know what to think of 2007.

if the dizzying highs don't subside overnight...

DU's Othello was fabulous--congrats to all the cast and crew!

                        oooooo*ooooo*ooooooo

so, i'm finally pushing myself to just keep designing (even if i'm not completely sold on it) just to finish, evaluate,and re-work it. it's gonna take time...i just have to be patient. 

thank you to those who've been supportive through my creative block and mess of a head. xxxx mmmmmuah.

                       oooooo*ooooo*ooooooo

i was thinking about where i was and where i'm going. i used to be a workaholic. seriously, obsessed with taking on so much and spending most of my life in the fashion lab, photo lab/studio, and costume shop.

lately, i have one job--hosting @ Sola while trying to find another design job as well. I go out wayyyyyy more than I ever did in the past. and I eat and sleep fairly normally for the first time since high school. 

it's sick, but i kinda miss that obsession--unhealthy as it was. gross, eh?

i want to do everything. that's a blessing and a curse all in itself.

and for the first time in my life, the fear of failing is stunting my work and making me not want to try. i'm not sure when or where i picked up this trait but it needs to go.

my roommate told me last night that writers are told they must write 10,000 pages before they're any good or develop a style. not that i'm a wrtier, bu it's heavy but somewhat comforting to hear.

i heart you.

so, a friend lent me a book called The Alchemist. i love it. it's exactly what I needed to light a fire under my butt and jumpstart my motivation. i reccommend it to anyone and everyone.

right now, i feel so relieved to finally be out of my funk and creative block. i'm riding the wave while it lasts.

i've been trying to soothe this nagging inside me for a while now and couldn't figure out what was missing. but now, i think i know what it is i have to do for myself right now.

lately, i've been so inspired by people surrounding me. i feel blessed.

never been very good at this

it seems like nowadays i only travel back to ottawa for holidays and funerals. i really wish it were a holiday this time. but it's not.

goodbye, Gran.

you'll be missed.  xo